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now with more domesticated flavor!.. just kidding. I'm a piece of shit.

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Fuck you, bacon. No one likes you anyway.
2015-10-03 8:19 a.m.

I can cook like a motherfucker, but I cannot cook bacon. If there was a situation in which my life was entirely dependant on cooking some bacon perfectly, I would just kill myself because I'd already be dead anyway.

[ say what? || nonsense! ]